Thursday, 4 November 2010

Volume 2 Episode 2

Hello and welcome to another new Big Red's Fun Bus podcast. Doing another wee experiment this time by mixing solo rants with some sketches.

In this edition I look at Hallowe'en and why parents being frightened to send their kids out is damaging to society, I trawl the supermarket to find a good porn name, and look at the fear that having a Tory government may lead to the murderisation of the Scottish working class.

Also in this edition, the Mercenary Charity Worker gets desperate, Eddie Armin presents his ghost busting service, and Leo DC tells of the time he worked with Jack Nicholson.

Plus Malcolm briefly looks at the perils of online shopping and there's another Scottish word for you to learn.

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Thursday, 30 September 2010

Wednesday, 29 September 2010

Tuesday, 28 September 2010

Monday, 27 September 2010

Sunday, 26 September 2010

Saturday, 25 September 2010

Friday, 24 September 2010

Electric Boogaloo Opening Video

Here's the opening video from the second live show. I'll be posting the sketches made for the show over the next few days including some unshown ones and a blooper reel. Dn't know if there's a video of the actual stand up performance yet as the venue was meant to film it but I'm not sure if they did. Anyway here's the first video:

Thursday, 16 September 2010

Volume 2 Episode 1 Part 2

Part 2 of the first part of the second bit of a pilot or something.

Anyway in this part we talk about Lost’s many unresolved questions, what we’ve been getting up to over the past year, our hopes and fears for our upcoming live show, and a whole lot more (or less), all in really thick Scottish accents so good luck!

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Volume 2 Episode 1 Part 1

Welcome to the first part of the first episode of the second volume of Big Red’s Fun Bus, or Episode 11 Part 1 if you will. Look on the previous ten episodes, or what is now being called by me at least Volume 1, as an extended, really drawn out pilot show. Well this is the first bit of the second pilot. Instead of sketches this features myself chatting with good friend and fellow comic John Speirs about lots of random things, for a very long time, hence this being split in two. Why pilots? Because the future plans for Big Red’s Fun Bus is for the show to be a combination of both of these forms in an exciting, new format that’s been done many times already no doubt.

Anyway, in this part we talk about the Pope’s visit to Scotland, said country’s inability to play football, Twilight’s many failings, Mario turning 25, and dodgy haircuts. There’s probably some other stuff too.

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Remember you can subscribe on iTunes. Just search "Big Red's Fun Bus". This podcast is the only thing that comes up, great, eh?

Wednesday, 16 June 2010

Episode 10 - HOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNK!!! (World Cup Special)

The football (soccer to those who prefer football to be played with your hands) is in full swing in South Africa and as per usual the games are mince, the punditry awful and Scotland aren’t there.

Still there’s much to love, like English arrogance, ITV missing a goal to show a commercial and those Vuvuzelas. HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK!!!

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Wednesday, 19 May 2010

"Inept" Vegetables

So I'm watching BBC Breakfast News this morning (well yesterday morning now) like I normally do while I get ready for work. You know the one, the bland background noise programme with the stories of people dying in wars crossed with some preening git reporting on how some tossers are swimming in a freezing river, because they're local characters and this is what local character types do. The one with the smug chap and the non-threatening sexually-speaking attractive middle class bit of skirt, that's a description of all the male and female presenters on BBC Breakfast News' roster.

Anyway it was on in the background as per usual and there was some serious story bleeding from the telly's speakers, all the world's Dolphins fall drastically short of national education standards and so find it hard to compete in the difficult job market, something like that. Then they went to the "not so serious so as not to put you in a total downer before you've even started your trudging commute to your shit job" story. It was actually a bit of a downer too as it revealed that sales of Cauliflowers are at an all time low. Checking the BBC website and typing "cauliflower" into the search engine reveals that this is a story they've covered a lot, leading me to believe the news editor's got a side gig as a green grocer and he's desperately trying to boost sales.

The reason for the British public falling out of love with one of the few flowers to be associated with battered ears seems to be that we're thick. You see we've been told to "eat our greens" by doctors and government types, but cauliflowers are mainly white. So the theory goes that the Great British public are refusing to eat cauliflowers because they're the wrong coloured vegetable for a healthy lifestyle. Sales of carrot's must be fucked. I mean look at how brightly coloured they are. There's no way something that orange can be good for you. Bite into a carrot and it's full of trans-fats and cancer which pounce into your mouth and murder you from within. So the theory goes.

Then "it" happened. It. IT! Now you're thinking, it must be an important it given all that pissing about with the typeface. It's a monumental moment in telly news. The reporter started doing the usual voxpops with members of the public who have jumped at the chance to talk about anything on TV because they're actually even less talented than those on Britain's Got Talent so this is their one chance at fame. "Nah it tastes mingin' dint it, yeah?" says one young lady, "I put it in everything" says a middle aged hippy type whose best drug taking days are now behind her but you suspect she still tries smoking some cabbage leaves once in a while just to relive those hedonistic days. Then "he" appeared. He. H... you get the idea, the he that made the it happen.

He declared cauliflower to be "inept".

Inept. Not the sort of word you're expecting during a piece about cauliflower is it? He had that air about him, the "I'm right intelligent me and I'm going to analyse the cauliflower situation in more depth than the rest of these oiks" one. And yet he ended up calling it inept. He called it inept and then didn't follow up why he thinks it suffers from this crippling level of ineptitude. I'd love to ask him, "what do you find to be inept about cauliflower?". Could it be its ability to do longjump? Or how about the fact that it can't work on an oil rig? You get the impression this guy would level a charge of incompetence towards carrots because he's been eating them for decades and he still keeps bumping into the sideboard when he gets up to take a piss in the middle of the pitch black night.

But why is this idiotic utterance a major moment in telly news I hear you ask, confirming that the voices in my head are back. Why? Because in one word on as an inane a subject as cauliflower's decline this man, this saint, showed that Voxpops are not news. They are filler. I don't watch the news to find out if Jeff from Swindon thinks it's great that we're in a war in Afghanistan because it means telly during the night's a bit more interesting, I watch it to find out what's happening in the world. But instead of doing that news programmes feel the need to show what ill informed members of the public think about things they clearly know nothing about. I'm still waiting for the piece of VT where local youths discuss how to block that leaking oil hole, although their suggestions probably won't be worse than the actual attempts to do so. It's in doing this that instead of finding out about something like the Daily Express getting pummelled for its shameful Dunblane "expose" instead we hear a man call cauliflowers "inept".

Hopefully this shocking incident will force the news to get back to reporting and leave the public to voice their opinions where they're supposed to, on the internet or from the back of a bus whilst pished on cheap wine. But then what do I know? Not only am I doing this on the internet whilst boozed up I also think tables are overrated. Quick Mr. BBC man, mic me up.

Wednesday, 5 May 2010

Episode 9 - You Decide! 2010

That’s right, it’s election time in the UK. So get those gladrags on and get down to your local school/community centre/municipal dump and get a-voting.

Whether it’s the live debates, Bigotgate or the Lib Dems finding out what people paying attention to them feels like this has been a riveting* election campaign, and Big Red’s Fun Bus has chosen to ignore most of it before making some fart gags and class politics jokes as per usual.

So make your election night Dimbleby-free by listening to You Decide 2010! We promise it’ll change the way you look at politics**.

*By “riveting” we mean about as interesting as staring at rivets

**It won’t but that’s how politicians talk, see?

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Saturday, 24 April 2010

Big Red's Fun Bus Live In One Go

Here's the whole show plus video sketches as one big video:

Big Red's Fun Bus Live from Big Red's Fun Bus on Vimeo.

Wednesday, 21 April 2010

Tuesday, 20 April 2010

Monday, 19 April 2010

Sunday, 18 April 2010

Excercise To The EXTREME!!!

Big Red's Fun Bus Live Video

Is coming soon (when I get some bloody editing software that works!).

Tuesday, 9 March 2010

Big Red's Fun Bus Live

Yes, really. Big Red’s Fun Bus comes to the live stage in a show that psychic soothsayers are already calling “a triumph” and “an effing disaster”. See for yourself which it will be on March 24th at Paisley Students Union.

Tickets are £2 and available from me either via the Facebook page (search for Big Red’s Fun Bus and become a fan) or in person. The times are variable, let’s be honest it’s the basic human need to compartmentalise the passage of existence that’s making me put some on it. On other words doors are 8pm then the “experience” (Ant Rogers, Paisley Student’s Union) starts soonish after.

Come for the ride (insert other bus-like reference here).